What is a Face Book?

When I first started this blog, I was told that the way to promote my writing was to join Facebook. So my retarded-over-40 brain filled out all the required information and was up and running in around two hours, (I’m sure it would have taken a 16-year-old 10 minutes). After two weeks of checking and clicking I just do not get it. Everyone is doing it, but no one gets it, that’s pretty powerful.

I have asked everyone I know and they are all new to Facebook, (even my 19-year-old employee), no one seems to understand the significance of “poking”, “Flair”. “gifts” or “notes”.

I made major fauxpau the first day and talked about a restaurant experience that was not favorable on the “Wall” when I thought I was talking privately to my friend. The chef I was bagging on read it, and lots of pots and pan throwing ensued. Why do I need to see who friends with who? Why do I need to connect with people from school? Is it telling that I have more wineries as friends than real people?

A friend who I love dearly, but haven’t talked to in years is now on there and I know what she is doing every night. It’s kind of like marriage. It takes all the mystery out of everyone. No need to call, catch up or go to lunch, just see who and what they are doing on Facebook. I got on there to promote the blog, I blog to promote my writing. I am a self-promoting whore and openly admit that. However, I don’t see how Facebook and the cute pictures of my dogs will do that, make me money, or make me feel more connected.

But I am playing along. Here are two exercises I was forced to do and them pass them on to my limited list of friends ( I apologizes for the misery of reading or doing this exercise).

25 random things to Share

Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it’s because I want to know more about you.

Here is my list:

1 I live for the ocean
2 I want to live in Grenada
3 I want to be paid for writing (like swimming pools full of money)
4 I love to travel
5 I love to giggle with friends while our feet are rubbed
6 I was a trapeze artist for 6 years
7 I wish I could help every foster child out there
8 I love to read
9 Bad books by good authors piss me off
10 I am honored to say my husband is my best friend
12 I am very proud of the people I gave birth too.
13 My dog can speak English and knows my every thought
14 I want to get a female Giant malamute puppy, breed her and take off 8 weeks to spend every minute with the puppies.
15 Everything in my house was found second hand, and its beautiful
16 I LOVE Memphis
17 My jag is my greatest material thing I own
18 I drink too much wine
19 I am happy about the way I look at 45
20 I wish my husband and children were happier and could see just how blessed they are
21 I can spend hours in a bookstore (especially a used one)
22 I am a cult follower to several TV shows but would never admit that out loud
23 I wish I lived on a farm
24 Wild monkey sex with my husband still is my favorite thing
23 I buy fresh flowers or a blooming plant every week for my self
24 I burn candles every night (but I only buy them at garage sales)
25 I have a very green thumb (Some of my plants have been with me for 20 years)

Here is another exercise:

Teri Bayus
Today at 8:19pmThe Bucket List. Copy and paste the instructions and the list into a new note. Place an X by all the things you’ve done and remove the X from the ones you have not, then send it to your friends (including me).Things you have done during your lifetime:
(x ) Gone on a blind date

(X) Skipped school

(x) Watched someone die

(x) Been to Canada

(X) Been to Mexico

(x ) Been to Florida

(x) Been to Hawaii

(X) Been on a plane

( x) Been on a helicopter

(X) Been lost

( ) Gone to Washington, DC

(X) Swam in the ocean

(x ) Swam with Stingrays

(X) Cried yourself to sleep

(X) Played cops and robbers

(X) Recently colored with crayons

(x) Sang Karaoke

(X ) Paid for a meal with coins only

( x) Been to the top of the St. Louis Arch

(X) Done something you told yourself you wouldn’t

(X) Made prank phone calls

( ) Been down Bourbon Street in New Orleans

(X) Laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose

(X) Caught a snowflake on your tongue

( x) Danced in the rain-naked

() Been to Europe

(X) Written a letter to Santa Claus

(x) Been kissed under the mistletoe

(X) Watched the sunrise with someone

(X) Blown bubbles

( ) Watched a Mardi Gras parade in person

(x) Gone ice-skating

(X) Gone to the movies

(x ) Been deep sea fishing

(x) Driven across the United States

( x) Been in a hot air balloon

( ) Been sky diving

( x) Gone snowmobiling

( ) Lived in more than one country

(X) Lay down outside at night and admired the stars while listening to the crickets

(X) Seen a falling star and made a wish

( ) Enjoyed the beauty of Old Faithful Geyser

(x) Seen the Grand Canyon

(x) Seen the Statue of Liberty

(x) Been to New York City

(x) Gone to the top of Seattle Space Needle

( ) Gone out with someone you met online

( x) Been on a cruise

( ) Traveled by train

(X) Traveled by motorcycle

(X) Been horse back riding

(x) Ridden on a San Francisco cable car

(X) Been to Disneyland OR Disney World

(X ) Truly believe in the power of prayer

( x) Been in a rain forest

(x) Seen whales in the ocean

(x) Been to Niagara Falls

( x) Ridden on an elephant

( x) Swam with dolphins

( ) Been to the Olympics

(X) Seen redwood trees

( ) Walked on the Great Wall of China

( ) Saw and heard a glacier calf (a piece breaks off)

( ) Been spinnaker flying

(x) Been water-skiing

(x) Been snow-skiing

() Caught fireflies in a jar

( ) Been to Westminster Abbey

( ) Been to the Louvre

( ) Swam in the Mediterranean

(X) Watched the fountains at the Bellagio in Las Vegas

(x) Been to a Major League Baseball game

( x) Been to a National Football League game

( x) Swam with sharks

(x ) Fed a giraffe

(X) Gone camping in a tent

(X) Seen both the Atlantic and Pacific Oceans

( x) Been on a horse and buggy ride

( ) been to an NBA game (WNBA)

This Post Has 2 Comments

  1. D

    I tried doing the 25 random things and it got lost when I tried to save to go back later and complete. I have no idea how to use the facebook thing. I have two e-mails and the face book to check it is like being the photographer and missing the event.

  2. Anonymous

    It’s not reading the notes, Teri,that’s the hassle; it’s the hassle of writing my own. And I’ve always said I want to be the Rex Reed, because he was the wittiest, of the Central Coast food and wine scene. Keep up the good work ;-D.

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